
“Self confidence is the result of having successfully survived a risk.” I first heard this from Jack Canfield during his 7 day workshop, “Breakthrough to Success.”
The more we venture outside our comfort zone and into the unknown, the stronger we get once we return back into what’s normal. By repeatedly embarking upon that journey, we keep building our self confidence muscles. You don’t go to the gym only once and expect to get that six pack, do you? No, you have to keep going, over and over again, to strengthen those muscles. Self confidence works the same way. But, why does it matter? Why should we even care about being self confident?
Self confidence goes hand in hand with success. You might be working on starting a new business or developing your business or rising the ranks within the company you work for or training for your next big adventure. No matter what endeavor you find yourself on, as you charge forward on your path to immortality, if every inch of your being believes that success is inevitable, you will get there. The first step is to believe that you can do anything. In order to do that, it is vital to develop a rock-hard level of self confidence. When you have that, you will be unstoppable. You will move mountains, you will find the resources you need, you will create all the how’s to get you from where you are now to where you want to be.
The other reason that self confidence is so important is that the one person you will always have a relationship with, who you will always be with, 24/7, and cannot run away from, is yourself, so you might as well develop that relationship. The conversations you have within you are the most important and influential conversations you will ever have.
So what can you do to start believing that you are an unstoppable warrior? Someone who cannot be broken. Someone who lives every day as the most powerful, the strongest, and the greatest version of themselves.
Create for yourself, what I like to call, symbols of infinite possibility. During Tony Robbins’ seminar “Unleash the Power Within,” he has participants walk across hot coals. Although I have not been to that seminar, a friend of mine who has, told me that walking across those coals made her feel like she could do anything she wanted to do in life. That exercise is a symbol of infinite possibility. By doing it, you cross the barriers in your mind that hold you back and an infinite number of new possibilities become available to you.
The problem I find with the fire walk is that it is not custom to the individual. I honestly would have no problem walking across coals, I have done things like that before during my misspent youth, so that exercise would not test my fears or push me outside my limits. For me, my current symbol is building my businesses. To me, crossing an icecap, going into a combat zone or climbing in the Himalayas is less scary than running a business. For many of you, that might not be the case. You may be experts at running a business or working in a business, but climbing a mountain might be scary for you.
For each of us, our symbol is unique and relative to our limits and fears. Choose something that is a monumental stretch for you, something that is so far outside your comfort zone that accomplishing it would transform your view of yourself. Make sure this is something you could go out and do immediately. Visualize yourself doing it and create the reality in your head that once you do this, you will be able to do anything. Some of you reading this may be thinking, just because I climbed a mountain doesn’t mean I could start a business. Sure, that may be true. But how far has being logical gotten you? I will tell you this, things like climbing mountains, serving in the Marines or skiing across Greenland have made me unbelievably confident. I genuinely believe I can do anything that I want to do in life. ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING! Although those activities do not directly relate to starting a business, they have built in me the confidence to do so.
Put logic aside and create a symbol. That is all it is, a symbol. It symbolizes the new you that is unstoppable and all powerful. Go do this thing and choose to believe that once you do it, you will develop the confidence to do ANYTHING! Prove to yourself that you are capable of leaping into the frightening abyss. More often than not, whatever limits that are in the way of your dreams are just in your head and are not based in reality. You get to create new beliefs that shatter these limits. Choose beliefs that are empowering and serve you, regardless of logic.
So what is your symbol for infinite possibility? It could be skydiving, public speaking, rock climbing, running a marathon, telling your significant other the thing you have been wanting to say for years, telling your boss that you want a raise. It could be absolutely anything you want it to be. When you think about doing it though, ensure that it scares you, thats a good sign. Think of fear as a door to a new reality. You can’t cross that door unless you create it. Without fear, there is no door. Whatever you fear, whatever is uncomfortable for you, go do it and become unstoppable. GO DO IT NOW! Right now take action. Join toastmasters, call the drop zone near you, go into your bosses office. Whatever the action is, do it NOW!
Remember though, you can’t just go to the gym once and get a six pack. Once you do that thing that scares you, relish in your newfound confidence, enjoy it and celebrate it. But then go out and do something else. These symbols are dynamic and constantly changing. Once you hit one symbol, create another one. Each symbol you complete gets you one step closer to your greatness. The best part is, there is no end to your greatness. It is truly infinite. So you will always have symbols to create and actualize. Each new one will get you closer to where you want to be in life, financially, in your relationships, your career, whatever arena you are currently unhappy with it, you have the power to change it one symbol at a time. It’s all waiting for you just one inch beyond your limits.
4 thoughts on “The one step method to building unstoppable self confidence”
Great article, Akshay! I need to read your blog more often!
Thanks Mark. Appreciate the support. Let me know if there is anything else you would like to see on this site. I love getting feedback so I know what would be most valuable to write about on the site.
Do what you want say what you feel because those who mind, don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind. Confidence is a crown for everyone. There are just some people who are afraid to show what they really have because they are afraid to be criticised by so-called perfect persons.
Very inspiring but my problem is that i am not able to keep up with my confidence for a longer time..something happens and i am back in my shell..i am an introvert and facing the world is a challenge for me and for this reason i am scared to take up a new challenge because i am pretty sure that i would fail miserably. This fear never lets me do anything..it’s like a parasite that feeds on my confidence and i can’t do anything but to feel pity for me…